You Are Not Unique

  by  futurowoman 

I hate to break it to any of you reading this, but you are not unique.

Seriously.

Your mom may have told you that you were special. Your teachers may have said you were their favorite. But they were wrong. All of them.

You see, right now, you're probably going through something. A challenge, or a speed bump, if you will. You probably feel lonely and confused and like you're the only person who this is happening to. You may think that no one else understands what you're going through or how you feel. You think your situation is unique, just like you are.

But you are wrong.

There are so many times we are afraid to talk about our struggles, our hurts, our challenges, our bad times. We want everyone to think that everything is fine and that nothing is really weighing us down. There's something to be said about sharing, though. Just this afternoon I had lunch with a co-worker, and as we sat in her office talking about how things are going lately, I realized that she articulated exactly how I've been feeling about some things lately. I felt a hundred pounds lighter after she and I talked!

So, the next time you're feeling just a little off or like things are about to come crashing down on you, remember that you are not unique. Somebody, somewhere has gone through the same situation and can offer support and advice to you. Don't suffer alone; reach out and talk to someone, and you'll see how un-unique you really are!

A Review of Dove Advanced Care deodorant

This post is going to be the pits...

Ugh, I know, I know.

(Well, how would you start a review of deodorant? Exactly...)

As part of the Influenster program, I was recently sent a full-sized Dove Advanced Care deodorant to review. Since I've been going to the gym a lot more lately, this was great timing!

The box grossed me out a little:

36% of what you remove while shaving is SKIN?!? Ewww!!

But, thankfully, there weren't any other disturbing facts on the actual deodorant container:

The Dove website says that the Advanced Care deodorant can deliver 48 hour odor and wetness protection. Since I shower more often than 48 hours, I can't verify that claim, but I can say that it does make me feel less gross during my workouts. Also, since I usually go directly to work after the gym, I'm always concerned about smelling funky, but no one has ran away from me in horror yet, so I've got to give Dove some credit here. 

The deodorant itself smells good. It's not overpowering or overly floral smelling. It doesn't go on clear, but I haven't noticed any marks in any of my clothes. I'm not sure what the retail price on this is, but I'm definitely pleased with it and will be buying it when this tube is empty.

Disclaimer: I received this product free as a member of Influenster, but all opinions are entirely my own.

Lurve

Fill in the blank- Valentine's Day makes me:

A. So happy! I love love!

B. So nauseated. Get. a. room. happy. people.

C. So sad. Is it any coincidence that the acronym Single Awareness Day spells SAD?

D. Huh? When is Valentine's Day?

As a newlywed (when does the statute of limitations on that word expire? We'll hit a year next month, but I still feel like that's new), I'm more likely to choose A, but that hasn't always been the case. There were many years where I was convinced that I would never meet that special someone. We even had "Anti-Valentine's" parties in college. But, I'm here to tell you that Valentine's Day isn't as bad as you think it is.

I know that as a married person, it's easy to dismiss what I say. You may even be mumbling something about how it's easy for me to talk about love since I'm married. I get it, I really do. I've even said that a few times myself. However, what changed my mind was realizing that Valentine's Day isn't just about romantic love. I wrote a post about this on my Thankful 366 blog a couple of years ago, and I think it's worth revisiting. Read, enjoy, and eat lots of candy on my behalf tomorrow! 

"Love comes in many forms. The most obvious form of love celebrated on February 14 is romantic love, but love (and Valentine's Day) is much more than that. As Chris, a student that I know from work, posted on his Facebook this morning: [Valentine's Day should be] about the love you have in your heart for another person. It should be about people that make you smile and feel confident and strong. He's absolutely right! Some people are in romantic relationships with people that don't make the smile or feel good. Some people are single, but have wonderful families and friends that continually build them up and make them feel great. I'm blessed enough to be in a fantastic relationship, have an outstanding family, and great friends, so I do have the best of both worlds. That's just my side note for those I love! ;)

The point of this day isn't to make you feel even more single than you do (and as someone who spend 27 years being single, I'm qualified to say this...ha ha) but to show appreciation for and be appreciated by people you love. It's also about God's love for you. John 3:16 is hands down, unequivocally, the most well-known verse in the Bible, and it's also the greatest example of love that any of us will ever see. No matter how great the people in your life are, they will let you down. There will be harsh words and misunderstandings, simply because we're all humans with emotions. But God will never let you down. His love will always be there on February 14, 15, 16, 17, and beyond. Be thankful for that and never forgot how much He loves you."

(And for those of you who remember me saying on Tuesday that I was going to post a product review today, just change that date to this upcoming Tuesday in your head. I know you're just chomping at the bit to read it!)

Back On Track

Hello again, world!

I didn't intend to be gone for close to a month, but after the last post, I've just felt like I couldn't shake the winter blahs and writer's block. I had planned to start another book posting series like the 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life series from November, but I've been having a lot of trouble figuring out which book to write about. I've read a couple of books that I haven't really loved, but maybe if I write about them, I'll appreciate them more. If anyone has read any good non-fiction books that they would like to see a series about, or if there's a book that any of you would like to read about, please let me know!

I've got a product review coming Thursday, and I had an author named Sarah Coleman contact me about reviewing one of her books (can't wait to start it!), so I feel like my writer's block is over! The winter blahs, on the other hand, seem to be dragging on and on. How many more days are there until Spring?!?

In Memory

Tuesday's post was inspired by my grandmother, Sandi. Unfortunately, she lost her battle with cancer Tuesday night. The last time I saw her was in July, when she and my grandpa came to my parents' house for my 30th birthday party. She seemed like her old self, at least in the few minutes that I got to talk to her before flitting about to talk to others. I didn't think it would be the last time I saw her.

When I heard that she was getting sicker, I always intended to visit. At first, I didn't want to visit because of various sicknesses through the fall and the fear of bringing germs into their house. Then, as she took a turn for the worse, I didn't want to visit because I was scared. Scared may seem like an odd emotion, but understand, I've never really been near anyone in their final stages of life. I've had relatives pass away, and I've been around them in the hospital or nursing home when they were near the end, but this was different, this was in her home. There was just something different and overwhelming and scary about seeing someone like that in their home. And, to be honest, I was scared of seeing my grandpa and my aunts and not being able to hold it together, not knowing what to even say or how to act or what to do.

I know all of these things seem inconsequential, and maybe this is just a chance for me to clear my mind. I think ultimately I wanted to remember her as she was when I was growing up. She wasn't just my grandmother; she was also the mother of my childhood best friend, my aunt Ashlee. We lived next door to one another for a while, so we were usually at one another's house. I'm sure we fought, and I'm sure she had to discipline us, but I can't ever remember her being anything other than loving towards us.

I could have been a better granddaughter. I could have done a lot of things. This chapter is finished, but there are many more to be written. I've got a lot of questions and thoughts about my future and what I'm doing in my life. I've had these things running through my brain for a while, but I think this has spurred them up towards the surface again. I hope that all of you take the time to give your loved ones a hug and let them know how much you love them. I know that can be said so often that it becomes sappy and corny, but it's so true.

Granny Sandi, I know you're watching all of us, and I know you and Shirlee are probably having the best reunion ever...and causing a little bit of trouble! I love you.

Heavy thoughts, heavy heart

This isn't what I planned on writing about at all today. My blogging schedule said that I was supposed to talk about the next book series that I was going to start today, but sometimes things happening in life necessitate that you change your plans a little bit.

When someone is dying, you're torn. You have selfish thoughts of how you don't want to lose him or her, but at the same time, you know that you lost that person a long time ago, when sickness started overtaking him or her. Some people go quickly, and some fight so hard that you can almost picture them getting over it and being restored to their whole, healthy self.

I think we take those who we know and love for granted and just assume that they will always be there. That we will always have time to visit them, see them again, laugh with them, when in reality that's not the case. All of our days are numbered, and as soon as we're born, we are moving towards our eternal destination. I'm just as guilty as anyone of taking my loved ones for granted. Will and I can sit in the same room on separate ends of the couch, each immersed in a different form of technology. Sometimes I even find it difficult to tear myself away from the technology when he wants to talk to me (okay, sometimes that's because he's speaking nerd to me ha ha). I don't put my family and friends first. I make vague plans of "we need to get together" without following through. I tell myself that on the weekends I need to catch up on housework and laundry that I've abandoned through the week while I've played on my iPhone, iPad, and laptop, and that I don't have the time or energy to go do anything with friends.

I'm not really sure how to end this post today. I could say that I'm going to make radical changes, but I think small changes are better. I've said before that I'm too dependent on things like Facebook, but it's not the dependency on things like that which makes me have these struggles; it's how I ignore everything else in the process. So, I guess I'll just end this by saying that I'll strive to get a little bit better each day. I'll work on connecting more with friends and family and connecting less with...everything else. I love and cherish and appreciate all of you who are reading this, and I really do hope that we can get together sooner rather than later.

It's Winter!

Since I wrote about all of the things I like about Fall, it only seems fair that I should write about Winter as well. I'm not going to lie; Winter is my least favorite season. I don't like having to bundle up in twenty-five layers whenever I go anywhere or start the car early whenever I get ready to go to work. I've even told my husband for a couple of years in a row now that I'm "boycotting" Winter. Unfortunately, as he's not-so-gently pointed out to me, it doesn't quite work that way. So, I thought that writing about the positive sides of Winter might make me appreciate it a little more. Maybe.

1. Numbers 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, and 9 from the Fall list: Okay, I know this is kind of cheating, but all of those good things can be applied to the Winter season too!

2. Fewer bugs: For some reason we had some wasps decide to try to share our house with us during some of the warmer days in Fall. They also liked to fly into my hair and dive bomb me, which really entertained Will! Since it's gotten super cold, we haven't had any wasps. I'm not really scared of any bugs (except crickets! Yuck!!), but I appreciate there being fewer around.

3. The possibility of snow days: This doesn't happen for me quite as often as it does for school system employees, but since I work at a college, there are times when we will have delayed openings or even the rare occasion of getting to completely shut down. I'm such a chicken when it comes to driving in bad weather, so the less vacation time I have to use to stay home, the better!

4. A new year: I'm a really big nerd when it comes to new calendars, goals, and life changes. January 1 is like the Super Bowl for nerds like me! I won a Neu Year calendar from another blog, so this year the nerditude has been turned up to 11.

5. The Olympics!: This one is kind of a cheater one too since the Olympics don't happen every Winter, but when they do, I become obsessed. I get really into sports that I didn't even know existed! Bring on the duathlon!

6. It's Snuggie season: Don't judge me. I love my Snuggie. I know it's essentially a backwards robe, but I don't care!

7. Valentine's Day: I know this is kind of a polarizing holiday, but I think it's a sweet day. And yes, my husband shows me he loves me every day, so don't give me the Hallmark holiday speech. Maybe I like it because I bust out my heart-printed Converses. Or, maybe I like it because it's when he and I started dating (3 years ago!). Most likely, I just like it because of all of the chocolate...

Dang. I tried to think of a few more, but I'm stalled out! Do any of you have anything you love about Winter? Share your comments with me and help me appreciate the season a little more!